Connect to your existing Cracked account if you have one recent Posts create a new Cracked username. Shows That Took Not-So-Subtle Swipes At Themselves Who knew these guys actually listen to fan complaints? Your Brain Games don’t teach you to be violent, or sexist, or an Italian plumber. They do teach you something sneakier.
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The top reason is that I wanted a multi-page layout, with a different home page than the detail pages. Most of the top financial sites are organized that way. My entire blog has moved over intact, from the beginning, except for comments. I failed to point out that existing subscribers to my feed were not carried over.
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Follow our blog for news, advance film and photo previews, exclusive behind-the-scenes spanking shoot reports and latest website updates. I recently received this glowing letter from a woman who had joined the site, and it touched me so deeply that I wanted to share it. This is the reason I built Dreams of Spanking. This, right here, is the reason I’ve done everything I’ve done. This is the first time I’ve had the nerve to contact you, and I really do want to let you know how much your work has meant to me, and especially if you’ve decided that stepping away from the site is the best thing for you, I wanted to be one more voice telling you that the work you’ve done is incredibly meaningful and still having an effect. Before I found Dreams of Spanking, I was aware of, though not at all comfortable with, my kink, and had this vague idea that porn was sleazy and not really something women were interested in. 4 AM watching videos until I physically couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore!
And then I started reading your blog, and learned that a creative, articulate, intelligent, successful, poised, independent woman can like getting spanked, and there’s nothing about any of those facts that are not compatible with each other. The last thing I wanted to say, because I’m aware that I’m really rambling now, is thank you so, so much for your focus on diversity in all areas, but especially meaningfully for me personally, for hiring performers with such a diverse range of body types. You are the realisation of my hopes and dreams. You are my proof that a spanking site bringing together all genders and sexual orientations can be a success. Cynical people told me that this commitment to integrity would make you untenable as a business, but in 2015 you were a financial success. You had enough traffic and a high enough turnover to cover your costs, invest in exciting new productions, hire contractors to help with editing and marketing, and still have enough left over to pay me a reasonable wage for my time. If it hadn’t been for ATVOD, we’d have pulled it off.
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You would still be flourishing and I’d be halfway through nursing your sister site to life. ATVOD singled you out for censorship, investigating you while ignoring other UK spanking sites. I still don’t know why this was, but I can guess: you became a target when I criticised the oppressive AVMS regulations in mainstream media. Or perhaps it was your queer and female-gaze depictions of masculine submission that singled you out as subversive. Integrity and inclusivity are two of your core values, and I’m proud to have stood by your principles.
I endured the trauma of the investigation, the threat of being outed, and the bitterness of having to put you to sleep while you were in your prime. And then we won our appeal. We emerged victorious over ATVOD, gained the moral high ground and saw the whole organisation disbanded. Even better, we won the right to publish the content we had been prevented from publishing – and we’ve spent the last year doing just that. So let’s talk about these last twelve months. When you re-opened after a ten month hiatus, you were in a state of financial precarity that put me in a triple bind. I’d hoped that if we generated enough press coverage around the appeal win it would boost sales enough to cover my losses, but since we re-opened you’ve never recovered your former success.
Since your hiatus, sales haven’t been high enough to afford to hire editing help, so my only option has been to cut back the amount of content I put out each week. In the good old days, we’d publish a complete new spanking video plus photoset, trailer, and behind the scenes video every week – and preparing and promoting all that is considerably more than a full time job for one person. I’ve been so busy it’s been hard to take stock, but even so, I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching since the appeal win. Throughout the autumn, with the Digital Economy Bill looming and the future uncertain, I started to entertain the idea of leaving you. But I’d made a commitment to complete what we’d started. When ATVOD ruled against you, the idea that we might never have the right to release the content we’d already shot was one of the most painful aspects of it.
Morally and legally, we beat them and I’m glad of it. But in a practical sense, they’d already won before I even filed my appeal. They cut you down in your prime, wiped out years of carefully accumulated momentum and traffic, and turned you from a growing small business to an expensive hobby I can’t afford to continue. I’ve been mulling it over for months, trying to decide what to do. In December I decided to not shoot anything new – it seemed pointless with the Digital Economy Bill hanging over us – and just keep going until we ran out of content. June, and now every missed update delays the finishing line. It’s started to feel like completion is impossible.
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Trying to keep things limping along is just letting the situation continue indefinitely without conclusion. It’s in my power to step away. A shift of attitude is all that’s needed. We’ve been together a long time. It’s been six and a half years since you opened for business, and I was working and planning for two years before that.
You are a labour of love, and before the ATVOD investigation, you were a pleasure. I was passionate about you and preferred you to any other project. But under the present circumstances the weight of obligation is growing increasingly heavy. I have always wanted to do what I love, and love what I do. Years ago, I sat down to create a job for myself which paid the bills, was creatively fulfilling, self-expressive, and politically worthwhile. You were what I came up with, and you ticked all my boxes.
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Spanking is a core part of my identity. I am deeply attached to it, and spanking is what has kept me attached to you. Our relationship has always been one of love, as well as business. Now I need to ensure that I don’t let that love distort my ability to make rational decisions. When I had to take you offline I was badly burned out, and it took about six months to recover.
Now I’m finding myself heading towards burnout again. I need to start re-assessing my priorities, and putting what truly matters first in my life. The thing is, this pressure of obligation is self-imposed. I can free myself if I want to.
If I reprioritise, perhaps I can create more space for relaxation and celebration, and be able to enjoy some of the rewards the last few years has brought me. There are opportunities opening up for me, and I want to be able to take advantage of them rather than being stuck in the same situation forever. For a while now, I’ve sensed that the rational decision was to stop updating you. And yet each time I’ve thought about it, I’ve found myself refusing to make that choice. So what am I afraid of? You have brought me so much. Creative and erotic satisfaction, the pleasure of connecting with likeminded fetishists who affirm my interest and make me feel less alone.
You’ve given me peer recognition, a political voice, social status. Our legal battles have brought me a reputation as a campaigner who keeps on fighting rather than backing down. I’m scared of giving up too soon. The thing is, although we’ve been in conflict with UK authorities, ultimately this struggle is not with an external enemy, but with my own fear of letting go.
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My inner enemy is the very stubbornness that has made me a successful activist. That reluctance to back down, to lose face, has served me as a campaigner. But it’s not serving me now. I had hoped that this new period would be one in which you were a going concern, a profitable and liberated enterprise which could financially support me while giving me a space to express my authentic erotic self.
But that’s not the world we find ourselves in. Thanks to the ATVOD hiatus and the Digital Economy Act, the economics are stacked too high against us. Just for a second, let’s consider the possibility that I might want to keep updating you. I’d have to stop doing paid work and borrow money to free up time to build you back up to the successful business you used to be.
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It would mean going back to start-up mode, spending another couple of years accumulating debt and working for free. The mandatory age verification in the Digital Economy Bill leaves me three choices. To maintain my current level of page views, I’d have to pay several orders of magnitude more than your turnover each day to age verify every viewer. To avoid having to age verify non-paying viewers, I would have to completely reorganise the site – months of unpaid work – and put everything classifiable as 18 or higher behind a paywall. You’re already barely covering your costs, and I’m not getting paid enough to keep updating you.
None of the available options are going to improve that situation. It’s time for me to step away. In fact, you’ve probably noticed I haven’t updated you for several weeks already. It was late April when the emotional reality of this situation hit home.
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In early May I went into hospital for an operation, and ended my twelve year relationship with D. It’s been a hard month, and I’ve had a lot to deal with. But even without those unusual circumstances, this would still have been the right decision. It’s taken me a while to put this into words.
I don’t want to let them down. I don’t want them to feel disappointed, resentful or betrayed. I don’t want people to think that I’m weak, that I’m giving up too soon. But in the end, I shouldn’t be led by fear of what others might think. For a few years, you were the reason I got up in the morning.
I was gutted when ATVOD stopped us from doing the work we had set out to do. Now, a year after your triumphant re-opening, I’ve finally reached the point where I feel ready to step away. Yes, I mourn the injustice that saw you cut down at your height. But what’s happened has had a silver lining too. My campaigning against the AVMS 2014 and, more recently, the Digital Economy Act 2017, has given me the opportunity to challenge the criminalisation and stigma of sex work, and advocate for the right to enjoy consensual BDSM. After the time I’ve spent with you, I know I can bring my dreams to life. I’ve learned how to build a successful enterprise, innovate, and take risks that pay off.